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You know what? I've never wished I were beautiful. Or MORE beautiful I guess I should say. I find it a waste of time to really care what I look like. I think I'm pretty. And way too many guys like me in my sweats and Goodwill stuff, so jeeeeeeez, think who I would attract if I wore the nasty tight crap. Probably a ton of guys, but all the wrong ones. I don't really like it when people like me. So, I become pretty good friends with this one guy, and we're practically amazing "be together forever" best friends, but then he has to go and ruin it and tell me he's attracted to me, and then I freak out on him and stay away.

Bleh. I just wish everyone could just be friends until about 20..And THEN the hormones turn on. Or 25. That'd be nice. :) Let's see. I think about 5 of my friendships in the past two years have died because of overloading testosterone. Lame lame lame.

I never post anything this boring, but that's okay. Sometimes I feel I just need to talk like I feel. :) I love being a kid! I just hate having parents who stress over MY grades. Gosh, I'm trying my hardest and I already feel bad about the D in English that I really can't bring up! UGH. And then they have to yell at me because I guess I'm 'slacking'

Okay. I'm home schooled, on the internet, so I don't really have a teacher, and it's just no fun, and I'm really bad at teaching myself. If I have a question, I can email my teacher, but it takes 2 or 3 days to get an answer, and by then I've already figured it out, or guessed. I CAN'T WAIT TWO DAYS FOR AN ANSWER!! I'm also WAAAY too social to be home schooled. I'm lonely all the time, and I just feel...alone. Haha, it's weird how that happens :D

I do a whole bunch of extracurricular things like band, orchestra, jazz band, cross country, track, and they are all made for the high school. Not home schooling. So I have to arrange my schedule completely wacky, soooo, yeah. I can't wait for next year. I'm going to the high school, and I'm going to have super mucho fun. Wahooo! And then after that I'm going to be going to the college for Running Start, and I'm pretty excited for that, too.


Oh! I raced yesterday. I ran the 800, (Holy cow that's hard. I've never done it before, and I had never felt that DEAD on the finish line! Not even in cross country!!) and the 4x4. That was some serious fun :)
I didn't do all that great: 80 split on my first lap and 1:45 for the second. Haha, 25 seconds difference :) I'll work on that...And 79 second 400 in the 4x4...It's okaaaay.... :P
My dad doesn't want me to race tomorrow because I hurt my back on Monday...but I'm going to anyways. I need to! The season is almost over and I've raced ONCE!
Wow, I thought this journal was totally lost, because it died yesterday, but DRAFTS are nice :D


Apr. 19th, 2008 02:18 am (UTC)
You should rest. The back is the main support for your body, and no good will come of it if you try and test it. Seriously, dear one, let yourself a break.

And love, we are who we are. If you're not ready for a relationship, it's awesome that you can recognize that. Maybe you're wanting something different.

Some breathing might help you - sounds like you have a lot on your plate.

You're breathing magic, by the way, dear one, seriously, you are magic.

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